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Passive Agressive I rarely write reviews. But I felt a need to voice serious and strong objection to many of the stories used in this book, particularly in the Leadership section of the book. Many examples are rife with passive aggressive behavior in which the author suggests readers should prefix what essentially is a command or expectation with flowery praise somewhat related to the coming edict. The result is a passive aggressive slap in the face.
As a manager or friend or family member or employee or what ever, you don't need to build someone up to ask them or tell them what you need. And you don't need to bury a request within a flowery suggestive praise in a passive aggressive manor. If someone used some of these tactics on me, I would react very badly and state "if I am not performing as required, just come out and tell me what to do better or differently, thank you."
While the author says to never use a "but" in the sense of building someone up with praise before tearing them down, it is still a "yea, but" but any other name or wording. This is really terrible advice even if you stress not to use the "but". You will not earn friends nor influence people including coworkers and directs by using this "yea, but" type methodology and the afore mentioned passive aggressive approach.
There are even a few occurrences in the book which suggest that telling a lie is acceptable. That you can tell a little white lie and win friends and influence people! The text does not out right say you should lie nor does it state that you should do so. But it is an obvious implication if you read the stories in a certain way. Essentially, read this book with a critical eye. The author provides sage advice but often follows that sage advice with examples of poor delivery which occasionally include deception!
The author's best points are made early in the opening pages of the book. Urging readers to consider that every person always believes they are in the right, even if the entire world thinks that they are an evil person. The author also makes good points in that knowing and using names is important. The conversational tone of the book utilizes stories from people and the sums up the stories with a conclusion. The stories are likely rare hits and a world full of misses. Good points mostly but too drawn out and full of stories that don't hit home and seem unrealistic. Maybe they worked in a different time but many come across as phony 75 years later.
Great! Wonderful book. I wish I had read it 50 years ago. It should be the textbook for a class in high school.
Great book It's a great book, but 8 CD's is overkilled. Actually, 1 CD could do the job.
Classic Awesome Book I love this book. It is a must-read for every salesperson. I'm not a salesperson, but I immensely enjoyed this book. I borrowed it so many times from the library, I decided to buy a copy. I loved all the old stories about Lincoln and other famous figures that may have been common knowledge when this book was written (in the 1930s) but I had never heard them. This book changed my son's life. In one day, he got the phone numbers of all the people who sit at his lunch table - just by following the advice in this book. It has certainly rocketed him to success in high school. (All this popularity didn't do much for his grades though.) I can't say enough good things about this book. Oh, one more thing - the guy who reads it has an excellent voice.
The book turns you into a self righteous know it all. I'll keep it simple. The book is told from a perspective that always believes that self is right. Sure it's got some truthful points, but it's all told from a perspective that treats all exterior forces as being in the wrong. This writer has no humility, and I'm afraid that anyone who reads this book will believe that the world is at fault, that self is always right, and that you have to be sly and manipulative in order to overcome the obstacles of all the dumb people out there. The truth is that everyone has a story. No one is trying to be malicious. This book would almost be good if it weren't told from the perspective of self-righteous know-it-all.
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